my bff accused of being a hipster.

am i?

Blogger, Twitter, Facebook, Tumblr...what?

I have too many blogs.

I am one of those people who is interested in everything but never actually sticks to anything. I am that girl who signs up for every single club at the activities fair with fantasies of making XYZ Club the most popular organization on campus, but ends up barely making it to two meetings the entire year. Then somewhere down the line, I become tremendously disappointed in my lack of success and end up eating a pint of ice cream to assuage of my self-pitying feelings of inadequacy, when really, I never invested in any of my endeavors to begin with. The fact that I have a blogger, a twitter, a facebook, a tumblr, a google+, a myspace, and a weibo (...I think my xanga and livejournal are still around too...) but hardly use any of them, illustrates my point precisely. I like brainstorming ideas and even starting projects, but I rarely have the patience to see things through. (Already, I'm beginning to question whether I should finish/publish this entry at all...) Maybe I'm too much of a perfectionist and I assume that whatever I'll be able to create will never measure up to my expectations. Maybe I'm too scared that truly investing in something carries too high of a risk of disappointment. Maybe I just can't commit. 

I can't even commit to a blog; how am I ever going accomplish anything meaningful for the world?

(42)

I am really craving a bittersweet love story right now. Sadly, Pittsburgh is not cool enough to have (500) days of Summer playing anywhere around here. So i picked up The History of Love, a novel by Nicole Krauss--and from the first few paragraphs, it is filled with loneliness and a quirky wanderlust attitude. It will have to do for now.

2046

所有记忆都是潮湿的~~

matthew 18:3

wow.

for the past few nights, i've been spit on, chased after, screamed at, and knocked around by a bunch of rambunctious K-5th graders all for the sake of planting little seeds. yet, in the process of teaching these kids who God is, i've come to see and feel the very essence of God's presence through them. i couldn't help but tear up a couple of times just watching their pure eagerness and enthusiasm. though they may not fully grasp concepts like grace, forgiveness, and faith, they are able to jump in with both feet. and isn't that just what God wants everyone of us to do? leap into his arms with no hesistation--completely trusting, completely faithful. i am utterly and completely exhausted now but i am brimming with joy and hope and happiness. i am so thankful that i was blessed with such a dynamic and enthusiastic (not to mention, absolutely adorable) group of kids who taught me more about Him than i ever expected. God is soooo amazing and infinitely good.

I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kindgom of heaven. --Matthew 18:3

just wow.

empty

thought it would be easy.
but forgot that it never is.

Ugh

i wish i can just take a photograph and send that in for my personal statement. a picture's worth a thousand words, right?

ugh.